Savo sent me these footballer quotes bvia email. I simply had to share.
For those Football lovers out there, see what your idols have to say for
them
“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father
(Shane Wakelin)
“Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like
Norman Einstein.”
(Mick Malthouse – Collingwood)
“I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.”
(Peter Bell – Fremantle – on his University Law studies).
“You guys line up alphabetically by height.” and “You guys pair up in
groups of three, then line up in a circle.”
(Barry Hall Sydney Captain at training
Brock Maclean (Melbourne) on whether he had visited the Pyramids during
his visit to Egypt:
“I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.”
“He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what
time it is.”
(Kevin Sheedy on James Hird).
“It’s basically the same, just darker.”
Jonathan Brown, on night Grand Finals vs Day Games
Ron Barassi talking about Gary Cowton – “I told him, ‘Son, what is it
with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, “Barass, I don’t know and
I don’t care.”
Barry Hall (Sydney) when asked about the upcoming season: – “I want to
kick 70 or 80 goals this season, whichever comes first.
“Luke Hodge – the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago”
(Dermott Brereton
“Chad had done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator.”
(Mark Williams).
“We actually got the winning goal three minutes from the end but then
they scored.”
(Ben Cousins, West Coast Eagles).
“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.”
(Luke Darcy).
“That kick was absolutely unique, except for the one before it which was
identical.”
(Dermott Brereton).
“Sure there have been injuries and deaths in football – but none of them serious.”
(Adrian Anderson).
“If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing
again.
(Andrew Demetriou).
“I would not say he (Chris Judd) is the best centreman in the AFL but
there are none better.”
(Dermott Brereton
“I never comment on umpires and I’m not going to break the habit of a
lifetime for that prat.”
(Terry Wallace).
Garry Lyon: “Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?”
David Swartz: “On what?”
“Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.”
(Dermott Brereton).
“Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air
for even longer.”
(Dermott Brereton)
And for u cricket fans:
The first testicular guard was used in cricket in 1874… The first
helmet was used in 1974. It took 100 years for men to realise that the
brain is also important.
“You guys pair up in groups of three”
Dont laugh, this has actually happened to me.
At least AFL players/coaches/administrators can string a sentence together – even if the meaning is garbled!
What’s really embarrassing – ex-Hawthorn players are over represented. Not Collingwood, not Carlton . . .Hawthorn. Ohh . . .the shame, the mortification.
The cricket line was pretty good I think. Should have it tattooed on Warnies . . .you know what.
Well at least AFl players can actually speak..unlike soccer players.
I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, “Barass, I don’t know and I don’t care.”
Could be a line from a country song.
Gold.
I do notice that there is no Rugby League players represented here…
Is that ’cause they are getting their lawyers to do all the talking these days ?
“My client pleads not guilty Your Honour…..”
Actually… um… I’ve heard a lot of these attributed to English football coaches/players/pundits before. And the Americans want to attribute them to NFL coaches:
http://www.dribbleglass.com/Jokes/sports.htm
And here’s a NZ rugby site with the same quotes attributed to a bunch of Kiwi rugger types:
http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/rugby/opinion/blogs/swollen-grill/1880414/Rugbys-most-smartest-people
Not calling bullshit per se, but… bovine effluvia.
As for the leaguies, what of the mad-as-arses Rex Mossop?
‘Those two twins look identical, particularly about the head’
etc etc etc
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rex_Mossop#Commentator
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2007/07/26/1185339165469.html
Don’t you go picking on Mick Malthouse. I have money on Collingwood to win. I know, I know, the smart money is backing St. Kilda. But I don’t like the way the Saints beat Carlton last week. It was a dirty win.
It’s very rare that physical prowess & genius occur in the same body. A good thing too, otherwise us mortals’d have to kill them for making us look so bad. I never fully realised just how close to inverse square law it is. Eg +10 points of physical talent means minus 100 points of cognitive capacity.
And this theory goes some way to explain my lack of sporting ability – the spirit is willing but the co-ordination is weak while the great & powerful Bob brain has it’s own gravitational field.
I’m with you Bob. Wasn’t it something to do with having just enough blood to operate one at a time?
Stupid punters.
Oh, wait-
Brereton FTW. Consistent performer who has his own brand of mixing console for use on metaphors.
“I never comment on umpires and I’m not going to break the habit of a
lifetime for that prat.”
(Terry Wallace).
Personally think that one’s quite witty. Not sure if it was intended that way, though.
Reminds me the great Alex Buzo coined “Australian Indoor Tautology Comp” of the late-70s which “Theasaurus Rex” Mossop won, well…”annually, each year”.
I dinno about that Brock McClean quote.
Usually its attributed to Shaq who was asked if he visited the Parthenon during the Athens Olympics
“I can’t remember the names of all the clubs that we went to.”
Odd that they’d be witty if any one thought they’d been deliberately uttered, but no one subscribes to that point of view I’m sure.
I’ve watched too many Footy Shows to believe these guys would ever say something deliberately witty.
I actually found:
“Ron Barassi talking about Gary Cowton – “I told him, ‘Son, what is it
with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, “Barass, I don’t know and
I don’t care.””
Quite a witty and smart response!
Sportsman are just like any other group – some are very clever. A few thugs, a few crims, a few astute types.
Newman is no dope. He’s paid to play a role. Neither is Lou Richards. Who also was employed to play a role. Both quite wealthy men.
Jeez . . . .Rex Hunt anyone?
Aren’t these quotes attributed to every sport in some email or other?
http://www.snopes.com/humor/lists/olympics.asp
Still quite witty.
Or am I stating the obvious?
yeah, they have to keep it simple. Pick up ball, bounce, and kick to other end, or Pick up ball/ catc ball and run into semi solid objects……..semi solid..get it!
I still can’t get over the fact they STILL go out in public WITHOUT a leash and fuck themselves up KNOWING the media have got a cast iron hard-on for them.
Fucken retarded if you ask me.
“Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
(Mick Malthouse – Collingwood)
I think it was former Washington Redskins quarterback Joe Theismann that came up with this particular remark.
I think JdR is right. I’ve seen most of these quotes attributed to other famous people in various fields.
Soccer players can too speak.
It’s just that when you speak to them then they fall on the ground, grab their shins and call for a yellow card.
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